28 agosto 2006

10 strange things that men do...

... that can only be explained by a primeval reflex to show off to potential mates

1 Cycling with no hands. Why? With folded arms is particularly obnoxious.

2 Throwing things in the air and catching them in their mouths. Sweets, nuts, cigarettes. Presumably it is supposed to demonstrate coordination. If it worked, women would regularly fall in love with seals.

3 Undoing bra straps with one hand. They think it shows confidence and experience. It's just sleazy.

4 Wearing massive boxer shorts. Why do men do this? Best guess is that they flatter themselves that their giant organs need the spare capacity.

5 Whistling. Presumably once a mating call, redundant since we evolved for speech. It is never musical, except at the end of '(Sittin' on) the Dock of the Bay' by Otis Redding.

6 Carrying a big bunch of keys. Suggests ownership of big cave.

7 Driving around in white vans with one wireless phone headset in each ear. Suggests potential to be rugged fighter pilot.

8 Making a fuss. 'Waiter, this wine is corked!' Dates back to Neolithic times when weak cavemen could achieve alpha status by annoying other males into submission.

9 Wearing hair gel. Robbie shouldn't, nor should you.

10 Goatee beards. Anthropologists say it indicates civilised manliness: 'I produce lots of hair, but I deftly sculpt it with my razor.'

1 comentário:

SkinStorm disse...

5 is very anoying when practiced in public to call wife and kids. Do they think they are shepards?