The Chaos by Charivarius (Gerard Nolst Trenité - 1870-1946) Dearest creature in Creation , Studying English pronunciation, I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse , and worse . I will keep you, Susy, busy , Make your head with heat grow dizzy; Tear in eye, your dress you'll tear ; So shall I! Oh, hear my prayer . Pray , console your loving poet, Make my coat look new , dear, sew it! Just compare heart, beard , and heard , Dies and diet , lord and word . Sword and sward , retain and Britain (Mind the latter, how it's written!) Made has not the sound of bade , Say-said, pay-paid, laid , but plaid . Now I surely will not plague you With such words as vague and ague , But be careful how you speak, Say break, steak , but bleak and streak . Previous, precious, fuchsia, via; Pipe, snipe, recipe and choir , Cloven, oven; how and low ; Script, receipt; shoe, poem, toe . Hear me say, devoid of trickery: Daughter, laughter and Terpsichore,...